if you want to read the original thread, check this: https://nitter.net/tinymediaempire/status/1136992675742269440#m
If I were drunk, I’d probably get 300$ out of the ATM and laugh the entire hour or whatever it took…
Then eat like 10 and give the rest away to people.
10/10 dark af 1/10 sandwiches are rubbbery
Oh shit I thought it was a shopped picture just for the concept
it is, the designer/illustrator Daniel Danger did a render of both sides
Yeah after looking again I noticed that 😅
“Cash only. I don’t have Venmo because I’m not some teenage asshole who vapes”
That part got me haha
My gf and her friends are in their late twenties and vape, how old is this post?
Very.
2019
Very old
Zoomer genocide when
2019
I’m middle aged and vape. A lot of us old-heads switched from cigarettes a long time ago.
It’s definitely poking fun at the fact that people who vape are younger on average than those who smoke cigs, not supposing literally only teens vape.
Sort of like how lots of old people also use venmo, but it’s particularly popular among the young.
Id love to see food trucks that were dirt cheap and just did 1 food. Please park this grilled cheese truck outside my house
I went to a food truck festival a few weeks ago, and holy shit the prices of stuff. I don’t think there was a single item you could get for less than $18, and that was like the price of three french fries.
Yes but they were artisanal french fries
Yeah that’s how it is here. Food trucks are only at events and event food costs a fortune for some reason. You’d think that having 1000s of hungry people in one place would allow the to drop the price a bit but nah gotta squeeze us for everything.
You’d think that having 1000s of hungry people in one place would allow the to drop the price a bit
That’s the sound of market demand going up, baby!
TBF food trucks are insanely expensive (like, $80K+ expensive) so I don’t really blame owners for charging whatever people will pay. I’m just amazed people pay that much.
In Colorado, that has been my experience for over a decade. Food truck food was never cheap here. In Portland, just this year, I managed a few great and cheap meals from their food carts.
Put this outside a good number of pubs in the UK and you’ll make an absolute killing. It would have to offer a £1 toastie, of course, but the principle is the same.
ACAB, my good chap.
I’m excited to introduce my latest business:
The $.99 Grilled Cheese Food Truck. Conveniently located next to the $1 Grilled Cheese Food Truck. Come with $1, leave with a grilled cheese and money still in your pocket (yes, we give change).
Honestly, from my experience with whole prices and no sales tax in Europe, I might just stay with the first truck.
I would go with the first truck specifically NOT to get a penny back.
Come to Canada, we got rid of pennies and legalized weed.
Welcome to the future!
If you sorted out the methodology one person could staff a changeless truck, you start giving change thats a lot of time.
Yeah, hi. I’m lactose and gluten intolerant and I was wondering if…
Yes you can fuck off with or without grilled cheese.
Yes you can fuck off with or without your face grilled
Fix’d
If you ever find yourself around Cleveland, OH, find a Melt: https://meltbarandgrilled.com/menu/
Melt is crazy good. Half sandwiches, vegan, gluten free, or full on grease and meat and dairy. I go once every time I visit Ohio. I’d go twice if I hated my body.
Why would anyone ruin a grilled cheese sandwich with a slice of tomato?
Sure, tomatoes bad, but have you tried jalapenos?
That does sound good
You two are the exact type of people to get kicked out of line at the grilled cheese truck.
NO GRILLED CHEESE FOR YOU! NEXT!
Lol that’s exactly what I thought of when I made my comment
Why the fuck would I order a jalapeno melt at a grilled cheese truck?
Pickles on grilled cheese is the superior grilled cheese and everyone that says otherwise can go right to hell
I say otherwise, & I will happily bathe in the righteous flames of the eternally damned, rather than suffer the unholy blight of pickles on my beloved grilled cheese.
Juh-lah-pino juice, green olive juice
Beautifully written. This brought tears to my eyes and now my grilled cheese is soggy.
Anything other than bread and cheese is a melt.
Let’s keep it calm here, ok?
What about butter or mayo?
It’s not just important, it’s necessary.
Mom made them with a thin smear ofmiracle whip inside the sammy when I was little. So good. Never tried mayo. Gotta give it a whirl.
You can use it to crisp the outside instead of butter.
I’d heard of mayo on it,but thought it was just for flavor. I gotta try that soon.
Pickle melt
suppresses violence.
Because tomatoes are the perfect fruit/vegetable and improve every single dish they’re in, without exception.
Anything else added to a grilled cheese sandwich automatically makes it not a grilled cheese sandwich.
I wanna open a beer garden the size of a parking spot next to it that sells cans of Rainier for a dollar out of a cooler and has a boom box and some plastic kiddie furniture. Party on.
Mount Near Beer!
Tacoma Corona
To be fair, I’d pay $5 for 5 grilled cheese sandwiches and eat them all in one setting.
There would be a line around the block. This is the grilled cheese of everyone’s childhood. Add a sprinkle of salt or use salted butter when cooking on the skillet and I would be in line with everyone else holding a fiver.
Salt? That’s it, your head’s going on the griddle.
Really? A very light sprinkle of salt when the sandwich is on the buttered griddle is the shit, especially if you’re using a cheese that is lower in salt. Get that nice crust on the bread with a savory pop. Combine that with a tomato soup and it’s the bomb.
Don’t knock it until you try it.
Tomato soup? Gonna have to flip your head over on the griddle. This is embarrassing for you.
(in case you never got it, read the right side of the food truck.)
But I didn’t say anything about a tomato!
(Yeah, I missed it)
Use a thin layer of mayonnaise instead of butter before putting it on the pan for a commercial-worthy grilled cheese.
I’d probably double that menu to include coffee.
No cream.
No sugar.
Take your coffee and grilled cheese sandwich and fuck off over thereabouts
What kind of combo is grilled cheese and coffee? Lemonade and grilled cheese, maybe.
Coffee is life.
There is nothing coffee doesn’t go with
A grilled cheese consists of only these following items. Cheese. Bread with spread (usually butter). This entire subreddit consist of “melts”. Almost every “grilled cheese” sandwich i see on here has other items added to it. The fact that this subreddit is called “grilledcheese” is nothing short of utter blasphemy. Let me start out by saying I have nothing against melts, I just hate their association with sandwiches that are not grilled cheeses. Adding cheese to your tuna sandwich? It’s called a Tuna melt. Totally different. Want to add bacon and some pretentious bread crumbs with spinach? I don’t know what the hell you’d call that but it’s not a grilled cheese. I would be more than willing to wager I’ve eaten more grilled cheeses in my 21 years than any of you had in your entire lives. I have one almost everyday and sometimes more than just one sandwich. Want to personalize your grilled cheese? Use a mix of different cheeses or use sourdough or french bread. But if you want to add some pulled pork and take a picture of it, make your own subreddit entitled “melts” because that is not a fucking grilled cheese. I’m not a religious man nor am I anything close to a culinary expert. But as a bland white mid-western male I am honestly the most passionate person when it comes to grilled cheese and mac & cheese. All of you foodies stay the hell away from our grilled cheeses and stop associating your sandwich melts with them. Yet again, it is utter blasphemy and it rocks me to the core of my pale being. Shit, I stopped lurking after 3 years and made this account for the sole purpose of posting this. I’ve seen post after post of peoples “grilled cheeses” all over reddit and it’s been driving me insane. The moment i saw this subreddit this morning I finally snapped. Hell, I may even start my own subreddit just because I know this one exists now.
You god damn heretics. Respect the grilled cheese and stop changing it into whatever you like and love it for it what it is. Or make your damn melt sandwich and call it for what it is. A melt.
Thanks for that classic.
To this day my friends know not to call a melt a grilled cheese around me or they’re going to hear my shitty retelling of this.
I love this copy pasta
Whilst this was a very entertaining read, you dropped your pedanticness (pedantry?) when you started calling Lemmy communities ‘subreddits’.
If we can’t call a tomato and cheese toasty a grilled cheese with tomato we definitely can’t call these communities subreddits! :D
I regret to inform you that it is in fact a Reddit copypasta, and not original content.
I feel betrayed
It’s a copy paste from reddit and I didn’t feel like editing the glory
What the fuck is a subreddit?
It’s a place where subs can gossip about their doms
As a non American, where I am from, we call them toasties. Cheese toasties, cheese and tomato toasties, etc.
I don’t know of any puritans who argue about what a true toastie is, but I may have lived a sheltered life. People will argue about anything.
Aussie??
Who calls a panini a jaffle for $500?
If we’re going to dive straight in to the pedantry then: a panini, in English speaking countries is usually referring to a heated sandwich made from bread that is a roll (long rather than square, with an outer crust and sliced lengthways in half), usually some form of Italian bread in keeping with the Italian namesake. Panini’s as far as I’m aware are filled with anything you want, but specifically are heated, usually (or exclusively?) in a press of some kind. Jaffles are like toasties, I’d personally call them a subset of toastie, heated in a specific type of press called a jaffle machine and made only with sliced, square, toast style bread as you’d likely get in a cheap, pre-sliced and packaged loaf. The type of press is important to qualify as a jaffle, as is the bread type and shape because these machines will only fit certain standardised bread types and needs to seal shut during heating. When you put a filled sandwich (with just about any filling combo but almost always with cheese), built with two, square, toasting slices, in to a jaffle machine the shape of the cavity in this machine forces a diagonal division between two opposing corners of the bread which also squashes the filling in to either of the two bread triangles formed on either side of this diagonal. The section of dividing line between the triangles compresses the two slices of bread together in that section, which gets particularly hot and forms a snappable, dark coloured ridge between the two halves of the jaffle. When your jaffle is done, it comes out as a single object with the two halves stuck together by the dividing line, but to eat, you typically apply pressure to each opposing half causing the brittle, dividing line to snap giving you two triangular halves of a sandwich with filling completely sealed inside.
You could perhaps say ‘who calls a panini a toastie for $500?’, because toasties have a much broader, looser definition like paninis. Even though the classic ‘toastie’ will more likely be similar to a jaffle, (though crucially not heated in a jaffle machine and thus not having the jaffle shape imposed upon it), it could actually be any bread and just about any filling (though almost always including cheese), much like a panini.
I really don’t like jaffles and I have noticed a decline in their popularity as I’ve gotten older. They are a good idea in theory, but in practice, because the machine crimps the perimeter of the bread slices together and also the dividing line between the halves as well, you end up with burning hot filling and steam sealed and squashed inside of two bulged areas, one for each triangle. Those crimped edges and dividing line mean eating one involves a chore of biting through a lot of plain, unfilled, nearly burned toast before getting to all the filling which having been trapped inside is ridiculously hot and inevitably burns you. It also means that, the contents tends to get kind of steamed during cooking, making things quite flabby. Much prefer a toastie made in a sandwich press, which is basically a panini press minus the grill lines.
You’ve just described a toastie and toastie maker. I don’t know what this jaffle nonsense is all about, but it sounds like someone is sneaking toasties through customs in a dodgy trenchcoat!
Grilled cheese with bacon is grilled cheese
Bacon melt
Eat what you like,but if you want a “melt”, go to a restaurant. If you just want a grilled cheese(or toastie),go to the truck. Simple. And damn,why isn’t this a thing? I’d kill for a simple grilled cheese rn
I would have loved this as a drunk college kid at 2 am.
Perfect drunk food. Greasy,gooey,and warm.
What happens if i pay $1.50?
Do I get .50 back? Or do i get half a sandwich or do I just get bread or just cheese or a bread with cheese but not grilled?
Cyndi B @spintheiryarns 7 Jun 2019 Replying to @tinymediaempire
what happens if i give you $1.37
Daniel Danger @tinymediaempire 7 Jun 2019
i round down so you get one grilled cheese and i get a 37 cent tip and also i put you on a mental list for being a troublemaker
Read section: bottom left; No change given, sort out your own shit.
If you can pay someone $1.50, then you can pay them $1. You can’t even pull a “I don’t have a smaller bill” or other shit.
If you try to pay $1.50 then you’re just being a trouble maker.
I imagine they throw the coins back at your face along with the grilled cheese.
I was thinking maybe they bake the coins in with the grilled cheese . Who doesn’t live a chocking hazard/chipped tooth?
I thought that at first but that seems too artisanal.
Coin melt
He’ll make you two sandwiches, but he’ll take three bites out of one of them.
What happens if i pay $1.50?
Like Chelsea Handler and his other exes, you lost 50 cent.
This cart is performance art in object form.
